It is likely that you have experienced the following situation: either by a desire, frustration, fight, or a bruise, your kid begins to cry. Without reaction you may say “it was nothing”, “stop crying”, or something like that. Although it is common to hear this kind of answer when the little ones start crying, restraining the child’s crying can be a way of silencing their feelings.
After all, adults and children need to cry! Crying is a way of expressing our emotions and it’s absolutely normal. However, as we adults have often been taught not to demonstrate our weaknesses close to others, understanding and dealing with the feelings of children can become a challenge. Some parents unknowingly suppress the children’s tears, trying to stop it at any cost, instead of helping to comprehend what they are feeling.
What can we do?
As kids grow, they get to know a variety of feelings, such as anger, sadness, fear, frustration, joy, and anxiety, beginning a natural process of learning how to deal with these different emotions. At this time, parents have a key role to play in helping children to understand the situation and pass through this. Therefore, listening carefully, talking, respecting the child’s time, and being available to help can be some ways of making them feel free to express themselves and still trust you, increasing the bond of affection between you two.
What can you say instead? Here are 12 suggestions!
- It’s okay to be sad.
- I understand that this is very hard for you.
- I’m sorry that this happened. Want to talk?
- I’m here for whatever you need.
- This will pass.
- I’ll help you figure it out.
- If you want to tell me what happened, I’m listening.
- It doesn’t feel fair.
- There is nothing more important than being with you now.
- I wish it was not so hard, my love.
- I’ll stay with you while you’re upset, okay?
- You are safe.